A little bit about Souls or Spirits and Psi-Feeding:††
1. What are Souls/Spirits and what we feed on:
Souls are one of the purest forms of energy as they are the human/animal essence and being. Nothing can actually be active or alive without either a soul or spirit. Souls are the true essence of a human/animal or plant where as a Spirit is the true essence of a being from the astral realms. Otherkin/Vampyres I now believe have Spirits not souls as our true essence is not human but an astral being from the Shadow realms. The soul is emotional energy as humans/animals are emotional beings and there emotions seem to run there lives which often tends to be there downfall. We as Vampyres actually do feed on either Emotions or Blood. I thought before this was incorrect as I thought Emotional Vampyres were parasites who made us all look bad but any type of Vampyre can make us all look ban no matter what they feed on as the news will tell you. The soul is emotional energy in its highest form as well as the core essence (life Force) of the human/animal being. Part of the soul essence also leaks out into the aura and then eventually it turns into ambient energy which is what most Vampyres tend to feed on.
Ambient energy is diluted and not as strong a direct feeding but is safer as it leaves us without much of a connection to those we feed on and does not hurt them. However we need to feed much more often this way or we may not remain healthy. Vampyres can also feed on Astral Spirits as well as other Vampyres or Other kin for a stronger source. I do not recommend under any circumstances feeding on other Vampyres! Fae and Therians have the best energy if they are willing to allow you to feed on them you would be one of the lucky. Most Therian do not seem to like Vampyres a lot of the time unfortunately. I do not support stealing energy from any of our fellow Otherkin Spirits but we must always ask first as they are family and do not get it back as easily as humans or animals do from the sun.
Elbert Einstein once said ďEnergy does not die but merely chances formĒ which has to do with reincarnation. Too many people believe that once we die are body rots and we are done. This is not true as nothing actually dies but either reincarnates into another body or goes to another realm depending on its chosen path. Even those who do not believe they are coming back do come back just in another body. The only way something will not come back is if it is consumed by another Spirit which would give that Spirit everything you once were and you will be no more. AGAIN I do not support things like this as this is murder in its truest form; at least if you just kill something they will come back or go to there chosen Spiritual realm however if you actually consume there soul or spirit they are truly no more except inside you but that is stealing energy in the worst way possible.††
2. A little about feeding:
As for deep or direct feeding your Life Force Giverís or donors should be close friends or family as with any feeding there can be a connection and most certainly is with every deep feeding. Feeding is a natural process for most Vampyres and many do not know how to control it. When we do not have someone to deep feed on we will unknowingly feed on people we do not mean to or want to and this can be hard to stop as it is a natural survival technique for our inner Vampyre as well as our selves as if we do not feed it will feed on our human body and we will suffer; we will become sick or even get viruses and our natural organs may brake down as that has happened to me before I was aware of what I was. I also know of another Vampyre who has a major heart condition because of it and she tried to not feed but is now better once she started feeding. Many Vampyres have heart conditions and get migraines because of what we are and it only gets worse if we do not feed. Humans/animals/plants get there energy from the sun as well as what they eat but eating food ONLY feeds our human body but we need to feed the Vampyre or it will feed on us or it will do it naturally regardless. This is why we must choose who and where to feed as well as where to go.
Many Vampyres feed in the Astral while we are asleep or even awake if we can travel there while we are awake; either way we will because of what we are naturally go there as we sleep. Learning to control ourselves in the astral is not so easy but much about Astral feeding as well as other types of psi-feeding is talked about greatly in Michael W. Fords book ďAKHKHAKU Ė VampyreMagick (the extended Vampire gate). However we also need to feed in the physical realm as the Vampyre does need to feed quite a lot as our Spirit is a very strong entity in a small fragile body as that is why many of us go insane or can have some mental complications if we do not take care of our selves (Vampyre). If you take directly from one person that you do not know it could be bad as you will gain some of there emotional baggage or mental state if they have problems. It is best to just take from crowds as it is not actually stealing since it is technically ambient energy that would normally be left behind and it is a very little that no one will mess. REGARDLESS they will always get there energy back from the sun as well as the food they eat and humans have a great amount of energy that is why there energy is what we need. They will always get it back if you take from crowds and limit yourself as to not take too much; once they notice you need to stop as you have taken too much. Stealing energy is technically impossible as have to allow you to take it as it is connected to them and that is where the myth about Vampires needing an invitation came from.
In order to manually feed we need to focus on the location or body of the energy we want to take it from and will the energy into yourself; it is best to focus on crowds of people and not one person so it does not create a link or take too much from that one person as to hurt them. Your eyes are the best feature we have as ďthe eyes are the windows to the soul or spiritĒ (but they can be our downfall if not careful and other Vampyres take from you that way). So looking at the location or source where the energy is at often works best. However many also feed well using there hands like tendrils as a way closer to the area and they can also be used as an antenna of sorts. That is why I go to Goth bars, Goth nights, or Raves so I do not look strange dancing the way I do (LOL). I personally consider myself a Spiritual Energy Dancer which means I feed on the energies around me best while dancing. Dancing to me is when I am at my most spiritual state and it is easiest for the energies to come to me. Even listening to music adds in this as well. I now understand that every one of us has our own unique way or method of feeding; this may be why there are so many ways and methods of feeding. Another method is touch or smell but that is best to be used for direct or deep feeding and only with trusted friends or LFGís/donors. Basically you touch them or smell them to extract the energy psychically.
Hello every one. Let me be one of the first to welcome you all to this new site. My name is Arthrone and I just want to say hi to every one and welcome to all the new people and all the old people who are transferring to here. Welcome every one and i hope to talk to you all soon.
In religion, folklore, and mythology a demon (or daemon, d√¶mon, daimon from Greek: őīőĪőĮőľŌČőĹ daimŇćn) is a supernatural being that is generally described as a malevolent spirit. In Christian terms demons are generally understood as fallen angels, formerly of God. A demon is frequently depicted as a force that may be conjured and insecurely controlled. The "good" demon in recent use is largely a literary device (e.g., Maxwell's demon), though references to good demons can be found in Hesiod and Shakespeare.In colloquial parlance, to "demonize" a person means to characterize or portray them as evil, or as a source of evil. The mythical Sweeney Todd was accorded the title Demon Barber of Fleet Street in a 1936 film. The 19th-century Australian cricketer Fred Spofforth was nicknamed "the Demon (Bowler)", partly because of his tactic of inspiring fear in batsmen. Baron S. Freiburg,16.4.2009
Interview with a Vampire: Friday, September 9, 2011
[Fair warning: This post is about a controversial subject. Please read it with an open mind otherwise please do not proceed beyond this point.]
Vampires have captured people's imaginations for centuries and have provided fodder for the Gothic horror-romance genre of fiction since the 18th century.
In the past, fictional vampires were typically portrayed as immortal predatory creatures that feed upon the blood of human victims, sometimes turning their victims into vampires themselves.
The recent vampire revival in fiction and entertainment, with successful film and television series such as The Twilight Saga, The Vampire Diaries and True Blood, has blurred the lines between fantasy and reality and added a certain amount of glamour to the vampire archetype.
In 2008, HBO produced a short documentary True Bloodlines: Vampire Legends to promote the True Blood television series. Charlaine Harris, the author of The Southern Vampire Mysteries on which the television series is based, states in it that she is "using the vampire community as a metaphor for larger things". The show's storyline is considered to be an allegory for the struggle for minority rights.
As real as such fictional vampires may seem to some people, that is not the type of vampire that I interviewed.
I am also not referring to the toxic type of attention-seeking manipulative individual that regularly depletes us of our energy and positivity without our explicit permission, sometimes referred to as a "psychic vampire" or an "emotional vampire".
I interviewed Octarine Valur, a Vampire and fellow Penton blogger, in order to gain a better understanding of the modern vampire subculture. Octarine Valur (Val) is her "nightside" alias and the name under which she writes for Penton.
Before the interview, I did some research on mortal humans who identify themselves as Vampires and discovered that there is quite a wide variety, ranging from teenage outcasts in search of a community where they can find acceptance to people from all walks of life who believe that they need to supplement their energy by feeding upon the blood or subtle energies of other living beings on a regular basis in order to stay healthy (in addition to a normal human diet). The latter group are known as sanguine Vampires (blood feeders) and psychic/psi Vampires (energy feeders), and some people are hybrids of the two types.
Real-life vampirism is described among other things as roleplaying, a lifestyle, a blood fetish, a ritual, a spiritual path, a religion and an energy deficiency condition. In reality, one or more of these descriptions may apply to the practices of a particular person who identifies themselves as a Vampire. Not all Vampires drink blood, and not all Vampires who drink blood do so out of necessity. As the alternative spelling of Vampyre means different things to different people, I will simply use the capitalized spelling Vampire here to distinguish the word from a fictional vampire.
I also broached the subject in public and read the comments of News24 readers to some recent articles on the subject (see links below), which made me realize that I had been somewhat desensitized to the subject. The overwhelming initial reaction of the public is usually one of disbelief and ridicule, which is probably not totally surprising given their lack of exposure to this particular subculture and alternative beliefs and lifestyles in general, the complexity of the subject, and the fictional stereotypes connected with the label in their minds. In contrast, the reactions of Penton readers to Val's posts about the subject have ranged from mild curiosity to vocal intolerance which has divided the local Pagan community.
Helen: I tried to research the subject before asking my questions and received some recommendations from yourself and other Vampires regarding information resources (see lists below). To be honest it is all a bit overwhelming and confusing. It seems to me that one website or book can have a very narrow focus and does not necessarily provide the full picture. I found myself wishing that there was a single relatively simple but comprehensive "Vampires for Dummies". Did I leave any important basic information resources out of my lists and/or do you have any comments about these information resources?
Books: Vampires Today by Joseph Laycock Val: Currently the very best professional study on the real Vampyre Community by a researcher who spent 2 years living and working among real Vampyres. The Psychic Vampire Codex by Michelle Belanger Val: A very good book, somewhat religious in nature, but detailing very clearly instructions on how to work energy and various psi feeding techniques useful to the newly awakened. Vampyre Sanguinomicon by Father Sebastiaan
Helen: You have mentioned that medicine and science have not yet figured out your condition, if I may call it that. Have there been any serious academic studies published or any related scientific breakthroughs yet? Have you or any other Vampires that you know approached a medical doctor about your condition and, if so, what was their response? Are there any doctors who are more open-minded and helpful than others, and would you refer such doctors to other Vampires? Do you know of any doctors who are Vampires themselves?
Val: Many vamps have related how they approached their doctors about certain issues, but most often without asking direct questions like "Am I a vampire?". I'm sure you could guess what would follow. Vampire doctors? I think the risk in going public with that would harm their practices - sorry, I just had a flash of someone in a white medical coat, saying "Trust me, I'm a Vampyre". LOL. Personally, I don't know any vamps who are also doctors, but statistically there have to be some. Often we encounter others who are in the medical profession who are medics, nurses or lab technicians - why not doctors? The scientific study side has long been neglected, but I'm happy to say that in the past 5 years on the international level, it seems that enough medical curiosity has been piqued in order to motivate some to take a closer look. In 2006, an in-depth study of real self-identified vampires, called the VEWRS and AVEWRS was conducted internationally by an American group called Suscitatio LLC. The results of this study are being quoted and used by researchers and academics alike. In some cases, particularly where psychic vampires are involved, certain university labs in the USA have engaged in various studies concerning energy transfer. As for academic research, the book by Joe Laycock you listed above is the definitive work to date on the real-life vampire community, and is being much talked about in academic circles. Currently there are also other medical tests being planned which will check the blood of self-identified Vampyres for anomalies which may explain their condition. Just last week, a study was publicized where aged lab mice were shown to exhibit youthful characteristics and behaviour when injected with the blood of younger mice, and vice versa.
Helen: How does one distinguish your condition from other medical conditions with similar symptoms?
Val: There is an old saying in the Community that goes "Nobody can tell you that you are a Vampyre - you just know you are". The simple test would be if there is an Awakening or not, and whether or not the individual needs to feed, and is positively affected by feeding - and if they are deprived of it, they suffer for it. Psi-vamps will often feed unconsciously if they put off the deliberate act of feeding for long enough - such as if they are in denial, or if they are unaware of what they are and what they need. Sometimes they will start arguments or look for attention in order to feed off the emotional energy - hence the origin of the term "emotional vampire". Hybrids and sometimes even sanguines will do so when they are close to or past feeding time, though I doubt they will benefit much from it.
Helen: How did you personally first come to realize that drinking blood would help to relieve your symptoms?
Val: When I first started craving blood I started out experimenting with raw meat in the kitchen. Also whenever I or a friend fell or hurt themselves, the whole "kiss it better" thing turned into something more direct. It was more than the taste, blood has always held a magnetism for me. When I was a young child, it seemed to me that I had this craving for it, and I would feel better afterwards. Another thing that I have noticed among sanguines is the tendency to nibble or chew the mouth lining or lips to obtain the taste of blood. We call this auto-vampirism a placebo, because it does not satisfy the hunger, it just weakens us while it satisfies the compulsion. It is a compulsion I tried for most of my life to stop. I can't say if this is an identifying characteristic of sanguine Vampyres, but most of those I know exhibit this.
Helen: If you met someone with your symptoms who has not tried drinking blood, how would you advise them?
Val: That is a delicate matter. There is a tendency in the community to not just confront someone who experiences these symptoms without realizing they are Vampyres - we call them the "unawakened" - the shock could traumatize them. Of course, they might also not believe it. We tend to wait for people who awaken to contact us, and then advise them. When asked by seekers about the need to feed, I provide common sense guidelines about where and how to obtain donors, or animal blood, what kind of animal blood, and how fresh etc, and what safety measures to employ. Generally, I also refer them to information sources for further reading and education.
Helen: I understand that you are a hybrid Vampire and need to drink approximately a tablespoon of blood per fortnight. Is that quantity typical for a sanguine Vampire? Can you offset your blood feeding needs with psi energy feeding or do they have a different effect on you? What are the worst symptoms that you have experienced from not feeding? Could it be compared to drug addiction withdrawal symptoms, low blood sugar levels, or something else that readers can identify with? Have you ever ended up in hospital as a result of not feeding?
Val: It seems to be a fairly average amount, although there are vamps who drink less because they cannot obtain the services of regular donors, in which case they may need to find other sources, such as fresh animal blood from butcher shops etc - or the lucky ones who have regular donors, or even more than one, and who can then partake more, or more often. I psi feed from elemental energy nightly as well during my meditations, but it is not enough to go without a good sang feed at least once in two weeks as well. The effects are different, and the effects of not doing one or the other are also slightly different. The worst symptoms for me are chronic hunger, depression, fatigue, paranoia, emotional neediness and a host of other unpleasant experiences. Sometimes, if I leave off feeding for long enough, it gets so bad I wish I would die. The depression is the most puzzling part because I realize I have nothing to be depressed about. I have never been a drug user, so I cannot compare the hunger to a drug withdrawal. The shakes could be compared to low blood sugar levels I suppose. Personally, no I have never been hospitalized for not feeding, but some I know in the community have.
Helen: I understand that it is generally difficult to find blood donors and that they have different reasons for donating their blood, including meeting the needs of a relationship partner who happens to be a Vampire. Apart from medical screening, what other precautions can a Vampire take to protect themselves from the obvious health risks as well as other risks? Have you ever turned a donor down? Are most donor arrangements long-term versus ad hoc? Are you aware of any Vampires that pay their donors for their blood? I have read about sanguine Vampires surviving on animal blood instead of human blood as a last resort. Given the difficulty finding human donors, is this a workable long-term solution and what are the health risks associated with this practice? Psychic/psi vampires aside, what do you think the impact on the Vampire community would be if scientists developed a synthetic blood product like the fictional beverage featured in the True Blood show?
Val: I would say that beyond health risks, it would be a personal matter. Some vamps are not very picky about their donors, I am. Although it isn't a foregone conclusion that a Vampyre and donor would have to be in a fixed romantic relationship, this is sometimes the case, and it would help in such a case for both to find the other attractive in some way. Some who are willing to donate to us have ulterior motives that could cause serious difficulties for a Vampyre in such a relationship - they might have an idea that they could also "turn" into Vampyres, and we sometimes get such requests, which are of course impossible. No, I don't know any vamps who pay donors for blood, at least, not in cash. Most often, Vampyres might do favours for their donors, to help them out with things, or pay cab fare, costs of tests, other acts of kindness etc. Yes I have turned a donor down, he wanted sex in exchange for blood and I refused. Animal blood is a workable solution, although the usefulness of the blood is limited to the amount of time it has spent out of the body and in the fridge. Obtaining it is difficult, and it really is not nearly as good or effective as fresh from the source human blood. Animal blood is bearable, but depending on the species it comes from, it can be quite disgusting. Cow blood is acceptable to me, lamb's blood is simply feral. I would say the health risks given the small doses we take are very small - after all, the blood contains pretty much the same stuff as the meat it comes from - if the meat is considered clean and disease-free, why not the blood? I know many vamps all over the world who have said they would be very happy if they could obtain fresh human blood from a blood bank or hospital. They would even pay for it. I think a synthetic - or cloned blood, such as "Tru Blood" - would go down pretty well.
Helen: For better or worse, the Vampire label has stuck resulting in inevitable comparisons with the fictional vampire stereotypes. I believe that you personally want to be taken seriously and not ridiculed because of your condition, yet apart from the label Vampires also seem to present a public image of their vampiric identity along the lines of the "dark" fictional stereotype. Is this the norm? How does one reconcile the one with the other? Is it purely a way of attracting and identifying with other Vampires and/or donors? Is it a psychological coping mechanism? Is it some sort of rebellion against society as a result of being forced to conform or hide your true identity? Is it the result of having different "dayside" and "nightside" identities that are polar opposites of each other? (I realize that the same can be said of some people in other minority identity groups including Pagans.)
Val: Helen, the vampire stereotype we have today is the result of Bram Stoker's creation, which has evolved in the "Vampire Diaries" and "True Blood" version of the classic. But if we look further back, into the middle ages and beyond, there are other myths and legends, not necessarily referring to the undead fictional stereotype, but to living people who sucked life essence, or blood from other people. These are legends tied to historical references to the Sumerian Ak'karhu, the Ekkimu and so on, and even to the biblical tales of Lilith, as well as to ancient gods and goddesses such as Sekhemet/Hathor, and Hekate. There are even those who support theories that we are the lineage of the product of humans and ancient aliens. Consequently, within the global community there are a myriad of theories of what we are and why, and where we come from. Currently just about the only thing we can all agree on, more or less, is what we define ourselves by, as Vampyres. Regardless, when we look at the basic needs of the mythical vampire - that of needing the blood or life essence of living people to stay healthy and to survive, this is the main reason for our identification with the name "vampire" or "Vampyre". The word itself is only a thousand years old, having evolved from older forms in different languages. Were vampires still called "upir" or "lamia" then I suppose we would identify by that name. A vampire, by any other name, is still a vampire.
Most of the vamps I know do find the vampire stereotype attractive and "cool" to be associated with in a way - but we all know very well that the stereotype is fictional. We are very well aware of the reality, and that we are not the stereotype - that we identify as vampires because of our needs. Much of the stereotype is secretive, as you point out, so is the real community. We find that this is a necessity, because of the risks in being known. If we look around us at other social minority groups in society today - people are persecuted and attacked just for loving people of the same sex - not even for drinking human blood. This is why we remain in the shadows. I have been working to raise awareness of the existence of real Vampyres in certain communities - but I have never recommended that individual Vampyres make themselves known to all their friends or family. The potential for tragedy is just too great. For many of us, our Dayside and Nightside profiles are just that - profiles. We are the same people, operating anonymously. There may be more freedom in conducting business online that way, but the idea is to interact with each other - and the mundane world - while protecting our mundane lives from outing and persecution. It is a defence mechanism. I don't see it as a form of rebellion, and I don't see it in the lives of others known to me. Rebellion would be more on the lines of someone who claimed to be the kind of vampire you would see in Twilight, one that is undead, immortal etc - when we all know that is pure fiction.
Helen: I understand that the objectives of the South African Vampiyre Alliance (SAVA) include facilitating co-operation between local Houses (SAVA member groups), promoting the safety of members and promoting a positive image for the local Vampire community. How do you manage the membership to ensure these objectives are met? Are there any specific membership criteria and have you ever excluded anyone? How do you distinguish a genuine Vampire from a fake Vampire who could pose a greater threat to other members and the image of the community? How is education relating to health risks and feeding ethics addressed in practical terms? Does this activity take place primarily at a House level?
Val: Only serious members who apply are considered. Those who apply don't apply directly to the SAVA for membership, but to member Groups. The member Groups are the ones who evaluate candidate members, and who maintain whatever internal disciplines are appropriate to ensure safe behaviour in line with SAVA policies. Members of particular Houses are expected to attend meetings regularly, to be resident within the region of the House. Yes, we have excluded several people from the community in the past, particularly those who indulge in causing trouble within the community. Members who by their actions harm the image of the SAVA or the VC will face internal disciplinary action. We have combined Groups which have Vampyres as well as donors as members. Educational information is made available to both to educate themselves and each other on matters of feeding safety. There is a specific group for donors only, which acts almost like a union, which also works to provide advice and mentorship to new donors.
Helen: In The Psychic Vampire Codex, Michelle Belanger states that differences of opinion between psychic/psi Vampires and sanguine Vampires have divided the Vampire community (presumably in the United States). Could you tell me a bit more about these two groups in a South African context? I understand that SAVA has members of both types. What are the dynamics of the relationship between the two sub-groups? What sort of ratio exists between the two sub-groups? Is one group more dominant than the other? Is the local Vampire community more manageable in size enabling you to avoid such conflict?
Val: The divide you mention is still a prominent feature in the American community. Ten years ago, it boiled over into full-blown hostilities, now referred to as "the Psi-Sang War". A divide still remains in the OVC (Online Vampire Community) today, which periodically threatens to flare up, but for the most part it seems the community has learned from the past, and grown. People don't simply pick sides any more, they seem to think about it first. Here in SA, the community is still much more solitary based, with solitary practitioners completely unaware that there is a local community here, many involved in the US sites, or not at all. I don't think they are even very aware that such a divide exists, or that there ever was a rift deep enough to almost tear the Vampire Community apart. Very early on, I set out to work to ensure that such a rift never occurs in South Africa, and so far it hasn't come up. Our philosophy in the SAVA is that whether we feed via psi or sanguine methods, we are all equally vampiric, and thus we are all Vampyres. We don't classify each other by our feeding methods. In order for the community to grow strong, we need to focus on the things we have in common, not the things that are different between us.
Helen: You are a Vampire who also happens to be a Pagan, and confusion initially arose among Penton readers because you are were blogging about Vampires in a Pagan magazine. You have categorically stated that the South African Vampire community does not seek to establish itself as a religious group or seek alignment with the Pagan community, but seeks tolerance and acceptance from society especially from the groups that you are already members of albeit not necessarily revealing your vampiric identity. However, some of the information resources referred to me and general symbolism used do seem to have religious or spiritual connotations as well as relating to energy work which Pagans are arguably more familiar with than most other religious groups. Is this angle not a major issue in the local Vampire community, or is it simply not something that you are collectively focussing on at this time as part of your identity?
Val: Like any community, the Vampyre Community is diverse, not only in terms of the kind of people you will find in it, but also in terms of our beliefs. For some, being like this is a religious or spiritual matter - and they will bend any belief system or religion to fit their circumstances. Some will invent their own religions, drawing on eclectic sources to do so - and there are several such vampire religions out there, some which could even be described as "pagan" due to their pantheons and belief structures. For Psi vamps, many consider that energy work and feeding are closely related. Many sanguines also believe that when we feed from living blood, we absorb the life-essence or energy from that blood. Again, some may attach some deeper meaning to the act, but for me the difference is that for one group it may be a ritual as part of a religion - for me it is something I have to do to stay healthy and balanced. Beyond this, the community is varied and diverse in its beliefs. There are Vampyres who are Pagan, Hindu, Catholic, Jewish, Muslim, Buddhist, and even Christian, believe it or not. The SAVA is a secular organization, and the House I am a member of, also. As a community body we do not ascribe to any religion, and freedom of religion is the right of the individual member to choose - and we do not intend to classify vampirism or our vampiric nature as a religion, least of all to work for it to be fully included within any single religion. To do so would be illogical, being that there are just so many diverse groups within the community. However, as a community body, we have taken it upon ourselves to work for the acceptance of Vampyre-kind among whichever religious or social group gives us the opportunity to do so. It is the prevailing opinion within the global VC, and not just here in South Africa, that religion is what we choose to believe in - being a Vampyre is what we are - and not a choice.
Helen: How did you first learn about the local Vampire community and Octarine Valur?
Damon: I admit to once being guilty of referring to Paganism in South Africa as "a freak show". I was offended that some Pagans I had encountered, especially online, believed the term itself simply meant "anything goes"; I say this in the context of my own identification of the modern religious movement of Paganism as somehow grounded more in authentic research and practice of pre-Christian religions. I now regret that the statement was actually levelled at some Pagans who actually believed that Vampirism was ipso facto a Pagan religion. Clearly I believed, and still believe, that vampirism per se is not so much a religion as a pre-occupation of belief, whatever that enabling belief. My first brief chat with Val in October 2010 was, if I remember correctly, a question from her about South African laws and their application to blood drinking, especially in relation to ritual, belief and religious practice. There are obviously laws against the taking of blood through criminal means but none that I know of that completely prohibit the sacrifice of animals for blood or the drinking of blood. Both of these practices are a feature of traditional African religions and are protected in ethical practice in three sections in the Bill of Rights.
"Bill of Rights Chapter Two Constitution of the Republic of South Africa
30. Language and culture Everyone has the right to use the language and to participate in the cultural life of their choice, but no one exercising these rights may do so in a manner inconsistent with any provision of the Bill of Rights.
31. Cultural, religious and linguistic communities 1. Persons belonging to a cultural, religious or linguistic community may not be denied the right, with other members of that community a. to enjoy their culture, practise their religion and use their language; and b. to form, join and maintain cultural, religious and linguistic associations and other organs of civil society. 2. The rights in subsection (1) may not be exercised in a manner inconsistent with any provision of the Bill of Rights.
15. Freedom of religion, belief and opinion 1. Everyone has the right to freedom of conscience, religion, thought, belief and opinion. 2. Religious observances may be conducted at state or state-aided institutions, provided that a. those observances follow rules made by the appropriate public authorities; b. they are conducted on an equitable basis; and c. attendance at them is free and voluntary."
Whilst Val does not specifically identify Vampirism as a Pagan religion, she does identify herself, her spiritual/religious self, as a Pagan. I understand and appreciate the alternative use of Vampyrism, as she prefers to spell it. Reclaiming a particularly loaded word by altering its spelling alters its pre-conceived stereotypes. Val has pointed out that the belief systems of the Akkadians, Chaldeans, Babylonians and Sumerians all made extensive reference to Ekimmu, Ak'hkaru and related entities who were viewed mythologically as vampires. I won't argue with history or mythology.
I admit, as I did to her then, that beyond a passing curiosity of the phenomenon in literature and film, I have absolutely no interest in the subject, either in a religious or sub-cultural sense. I accept that it has become a popular sub-cultural movement, but I don't agree that it is in any way akin to clearly identified pagan or Pagan religious belief systems as I know them. I accept that others may disagree with me. Whether or not we agree, everyone is entitled by law to self-identify as they choose, even if it means we must disagree on what does or does not constitute the modern Pagan religious movement. I won't exclude Val from a religious community she obviously feels a part of. I don't think anyone else should either.
Helen: What was your rationale for inviting Val to blog for Penton?
Damon: Val responded to a request for bloggers to write for Penton. As she said in 2010, "Agreeing or disagreeing doesn't mean people need to stop talking." I wanted her to share with Penton's readers what was happening in her own insular community. If diversity has any value at all it must be the opportunity to encounter difference, to understand it, to relate to it in a positive and meaningful way. I think Val has succeeded in shifting quite a few preconceived beliefs regarding Vampyrism and those amongst us who identify as Vampires in South Africa.
Helen: Do you have any firm criteria regarding Penton bloggers or blog posts?
Damon: Other than that Penton's bloggers have their own point of view and blog weekly, I don't set any criteria for content. I want Penton's bloggers to feel free enough to write whatever they want to, on anything they want to. The assumption some often make is that Pagans only talk about Paganism, when in fact we have a great many non-Pagan specific interests other Pagans may also take an interest in.
Helen: Did you anticipate the controversy that arose as a result of Val's posts? Has there been such a negative reaction from Penton readers before and, if so, what were the circumstances?
Damon: Naively, no. Perhaps if I had I would have prepared better for the ensuing pitch of tar and feathers. As I explained in my editor's letter in July, grappling with diversity of thought, belief and opinion can, for some, be an onerous and challenging experience. Penton‚Äôs inclusion of material on Vampirism, dual-faith (Christian-Pagan) religion and Satanism has elicited both praise and condemnation. Pagans who remain intolerant toward proselytizing forms of Christianity have argued against the inclusion of Christian content in a Pagan magazine, whilst others have argued equally against the inclusion of content on Vampirism and Satanism on the grounds that neither are "Pagan", or more specifically "Wiccan". Penton does not, and has never, claimed to represent only one pre-approved or consensual form of Paganism or neo-Paganism (whether that be reconstructionist, eclectic or new-age). On the contrary, since 1995 Penton Magazine has been dedicated in its exploration of Pagans and Paganism and associated occult philosophy, sacred spirituality and religion, in its diversity. Penton will continue to do so. The right of association isn't really relevant to the content of this or any other magazine. Penton is not supported by advertising and thus remains wholly independent.
Helen: What impact have Val's posts had on Penton readership overall? Did you gain some new readers and bloggers as well as losing some readers and bloggers?
Damon: I think we've lost a few readers. I imagine most of Penton's regular readers are still getting used to the increased frequency of publication. I'm also sure we've attracted a new kind of reader, whether curious about Vampyrism or not. Two bloggers opted not to write for Penton anymore. Four new bloggers joined the team. I suspect everyone has learned something valuable from this. I hope readers will continue to engage with Penton‚Äôs blogs and articles, whether the content leaves them feeling fulfilled or tormented.
Helen: Can we expect more controversial posts in future and what types of new bloggers are you keeping an eye out for?
Damon: I am always looking for new bloggers who have a point of view on any subject. I would love to include writers who enjoy argument and analysis, who thrive on political comment, news and entertainment. I would especially love to include budding journalists looking to exercise their investigative skills. Penton has published and will continue to publish diverse and controversial material and will continue to widen its diversity by inviting new bloggers from many different backgrounds and life-styles to join its existing team of bloggers. In an ideal world everyone would be paid for their work but Penton does not generate any financial benefit. I know that those who write for Penton do so because they love to write for its own sake, and I thank them for their creative generosity.
Helen: As far as I can tell, the initial response from Penton readers to Val's posts was positive. Do you have any idea why later reactions were less positive and why these posts ultimately led to so much conflict in the local Pagan community? Do such conflicts arise often? Are they part of the growing pains of a young community trying to define its identity? Did the viral nature of online discussions contribute to blowing the whole story out of proportion?
Damon: I agree. I think more people grew from their encounter with Val's blog "The Truth doesn't sparkle". If Witches have learned anything from our own experience as an out community it is that silence and shadows breeds mistrust, perpetuating groundless fears of the unknown.
It would be unfair of me to paint a picture of a community of individuals who would prefer to see other Pagans fail than succeed. Most Pagans actually remained silent on the issue. A very few chose to marshal their morality against what they perceived to be a threat against the Pagan community from within their own rank and file. The content in question neither promotes war, nor incites violence, and it does not advocate hatred based on race, ethnicity, gender or religion. It might shock you or leave you breathless, but it can't prevent you from practicing your personal religion the way you choose to. I think there will always be new Pagans looking to stamp their own identity on what they perceive to be real for them at that moment. Largely online discussion didn't really help to resolve the conflict of perception, but a lot of people who did participate in online conversations learned something about their own prejudices and where they were prepared to draw the line.
Helen: The storyline of the True Blood show is considered to be an allegory for the struggle for minority rights and the similarities to the experiences of local Vampires coming out in the open are surreal. While Pagans are subjected to intolerance themselves, the local Pagan community forms a diverse group and tolerance levels towards others vary considerably within the group. Do you believe that the local Pagan community can learn from this experience and handle a similar situation better in future? What have you personally learnt from the experience? Is there anything you would have done differently in hindsight? Do you have any suggestions for how any future conflicts of this nature can be managed in a more civilized and constructive manner?
Damon: Our national religious community is not free of prejudice. We're a reflection of the society in which we live, not apart from it at all. We live in a largely intolerant society, especially toward minorities of every kind. I hope we can start looking at each other as people and not as labels or objects. We don't have to agree, but if we're going to give the "Pagan religion" ideal a go, we have to start with the willingness to accommodate difference, allow for honest dissent, and seek common ground as humans first.
I would like to thank Val and Damon for being so accommodating and making this post possible.
Michael Vampire is a living vampire. He‚Äôs pretty sure that since joining Vampires Everywhere!, his gothic band mates (Aaron Graves, Phillip Kross, Alexandre Rogue, David Darko) have become inspired to trade in their beach days for the underground lifestyle as well. In an interview with ChinaShop, Michael reveals his trials and tribulations of modern day blood drinking and explains how to be a ‚Äúsafe vampire.‚ÄĚ In addition to picking Michael‚Äôs brain on the ways of vampirism, aggressive rock music, and strategies for avoiding the sun, we snapped a few pictures of a vampire couch cushion fight (which we may or may not have instigated). It‚Äôs not often that you have a room full of vampires at your disposal so when you do, an epic photo shoot is necessary!
How do you describe your music?
Michael:I‚Äôd say hard rock or more like gothic metal which people describe us as. We have one of those genres that you can‚Äôt really pin point so we‚Äôre trying to create something new and fresh.
What bands are you inspired by?
Michael:Nine Inch Nails, Marilyn Manson, Fugazi‚Ä¶I‚Äôm going back! Old records like Pennywise. The stuff we play now is more of a new school version of that. It is very metal. There is a lot of screaming but there are also hooks. I like to play aggressive music so that‚Äôs what it is.
What is the whole story behind the band name and the whole vampire thing?
Michael:The band name comes from the comic book and the movie ‚ÄúThe Lost Boys.‚ÄĚ The concept of the band was for myself trying to be true to what I‚Äôve been trying to do for years. I‚Äôve been in pop rock bands and all sorts of other things but this is my own thing and this is how I feel about music and the aggression I‚Äôm putting towards it. And the name kind of symbolizes that. Also, I believe I‚Äôm a living vampire so both go hand in hand.
Do you know when you turned?
Michael:Six months into starting the band actually. I had the realization of it. I actually met another living vampire that introduced me to the underground lifestyle of certain things.
Do you drink blood and do all that?
Michael:I‚Äôve only done it 4 or 5 times. I‚Äôm lying; I‚Äôve done it 6 times. I did it to this one girl recently. I don‚Äôt do that usually because I can‚Äôt sleep at night thinking I have something.
But you can buy it can‚Äôt you in the underground market?
Michael:Yeah but it‚Äôs not as fun.
How exactly do you get the blood? Do you full on suck someone‚Äôs neck?
Michael:I came up with this hickey thing I do but as far as the blood-sharing thing, the proper way to do it is a reverse IV. I‚Äôve only done that twice.
Do you do the whole medical records checking thing? ‚ÄúI need to make sure you‚Äôre clean‚ÄĚ and all that jazz?
Michael:Well I‚Äôve been doing that afterward. They send me little pictures and stuff.
So these aren‚Äôt people you are dating? You just go onto some website and be like, ‚ÄúI want to suck your blood?‚ÄĚ
Michael:No I just go around Hollywood or on tour. I mean it‚Äôs pretty simplistic. I give off kind of a euphoria and it seems to be where I have no problem doing that. It‚Äôs very energy filled.
How do you guys feel about the whole ‚ÄúTrue Blood,‚ÄĚ ‚ÄúTwilight‚ÄĚ thing ruining the vampire image?
Michael:I love true blood. I mean it‚Äôs sex and rock and roll. ‚ÄúTwilight‚ÄĚ is just Mormon vampires. Nothing wrong with getting married and doing what you gotta do. It‚Äôs not my thing. There is no fucking in it. There‚Äôs no blood.
Yeah the movies don‚Äôt but I think the books have sex and blood, don‚Äôt they?
Michael:I‚Äôve actually had the honor of both. I didn‚Äôt go through the whole book series but the books are better. She‚Äôs coming from a college for Mormons so she has her ideal set on what morality is and what is should be. For us if you‚Äôre just looking at us or talking to us, you‚Äôll see that we‚Äôre not that at all.
Are you the only one in the band that thinks that you are a vampire?
Michael:I‚Äôve never asked. I think Aaron who isn‚Äôt here right now kind of had a realization a while ago. He hasn‚Äôt gone to the level I‚Äôve gone to though.
Phil:I think for me too it‚Äôs not on that level but it‚Äôs like when I joined the band and became an official member, a lot of things started making sense. The way I‚Äôve always acted my entire life made total sense with the vampire culture, minus the thing with blood play and all that, but extremely nocturnal, rock and roll as fuck, you know what I mean. When we joined this band everything just made sense.
So you hate the daylight and all that?
Michael:Oh I loathe the sun. Well I‚Äôve come to the realization that the sun does make you weaker. I can‚Äôt be near it. I have to get thru it. I hardly go outside during the day to be honest with you. I‚Äôm honestly in a car cruising along. I‚Äôll be at Starbucks and then go right home.
How much preparation goes into your on stage look?
Michael:As of lately, a whole shitload. We started going to Forgotten Saints to get specific stuff made. We finally solidified a line up so people that were fakes left. Actually it‚Äôs funny because all the Christians left. Anyway, this lineup seems to be more my style and I look side to side and I‚Äôm happy with what I‚Äôm seeing.
Are you in your stage gear now?
Michael:I‚Äôm not personally. I have to put more shit on. When I‚Äôm in the heat, I try to keep it light. When I was at Warped Tour, I was looking decent and then all of a sudden I started melting. I saw myself in pictures and was like, ‚ÄúThis is not happening.‚ÄĚ
What are most of your fans like?
Phil:I‚Äôd say anywhere from 12 to 40. We have some diehard super fans that are like 45 years that are just as into it as their child is and they bring the whole family and they‚Äôre rocking the shirts.
Do they have names?
Phil:They are called ‚ÄúVamp Tramps‚ÄĚ and then ‚ÄúCovens.‚ÄĚ The come out to our shows and bring us stuff. They know we love Jack Daniels so they‚Äôll bring that to us.
Michael: And I got a $100 Starbucks card. The weirdest thing is the vials of blood. When we first started getting going, this one girl sent us her blood in little vials. I still have the vial because I think it‚Äôs cool but I threw the blood out. I‚Äôm not gonna drink it. I don‚Äôt know what‚Äôs in there.
That‚Äôs like somebody giving you a cupcake and you having no idea what‚Äôs in it.
Michael:They do that too. I made the mistake of saying Red Velvet cupcakes and that‚Äôs all we get but I don‚Äôt know what is in there.
You drink blood and test the people afterward but then you‚Äôre scared of cupcakes?
Michael:Yeah weird. I‚Äôm getting back into it though. I have this whole new thing I‚Äôve been doing. I‚Äôm back into the whole condom thing. I‚Äôm back to being safe. I‚Äôm a safe person now.
Phil:You‚Äôre a safe vampire!
Words and interview by Nicole Pajer. Photos by Dustin Downing
This entry was posted on Tuesday, August 30th, 2011 at 10:36 am and is filed under Gallery, Music. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
Vampires: Mythological or folkloric beings who subsist by feeding on the life essence (generally in the form of blood) of living creatures, regardless of whether they are undead or a living person. ‚Äď Wikipedia
1. A corpse supposed, in European folklore, to leave its grave at night to drink the blood of the living by biting their necks with long pointed canine teeth. 2. A person who preys ruthlessly on others. ‚Äď Dictionary.com
A pale yet handsome 104-year old high school boy named Edward Cullen who goes against his better judgment, gives into urges, and falls in love with a mortal named Bella Swan. ‚Äď Twilight movie series
Clearly, the word ‚Äúvampire‚ÄĚ means something different to everyone, but that‚Äôs part of what makes us so curious, isn‚Äôt it? Part of the allure of the whole vampire thing is the fact that these supposed creatures are so ambiguous to us. There are people out there that claim to be vampires but what exactly does that mean? Do they really suck people‚Äôs blood? Do they have sex in coffins? Do these modern day vampires hide from the daylight and are they immortal?
Michael Vampire, lead singer of Vampires Everywhere!, considers himself to be a modern vampire living in urban Los Angeles and has volunteered to help walk us through common stereotypes regarding the vampire lifestyle. Michael explains what is true and what is far from it and divulges what modern day vampirism is all about:
How do people know that they are vampires?
There are many different reasons to embrace the vampire lifestyle. Some people just want a place to belong and some people actually find themselves within the culture. The idea of self realization through the vampire way of life is called ‚Äúembraced,‚ÄĚ which is the act of turning into a vampire ‚Äď whether it be blood or energy oriented. I found myself within the vampire culture due to the strong aura I give off and the minor psychic abilities from my mother side of the family. For me, it was the perfect fit!
In order to be a vampire, do you have to have a certain ‚Äúlook‚ÄĚ that you must pull off to maintain authenticity?
To be truly dedicated to the vampire lifestyle, one must live it every day and not use it as a way to dress up on weekends. Common trends in the vampire lifestyle would include the typical Goth attire ‚Äď being black clothes & white makeup. Fangs are also part of the lifestyle, which are usually custom made and worn religiously. Keeping your skin pale white can be a hassle in southern California but I manage to do it just fine. The sun not only darkens your skin, but also makes you weak if you truly embrace the vampire lifestyle. The sharing of energy, whether blood or life force, is definitely a trait shared by die hard vampires. I partake in both energy related activities and believe in it whole heartily.
Are vampires really immortal?
I do not feel immortal because I am a living vampire. The mythology behind the vampire culture would have people think this is true, however, so is the idea of wearing a tuxedo around town talking in a Romanian accent. Because of the large amount of energy harbored within my body I feel I do age slower to the eye.
Do vampires drink blood?
The answer to that is yes. Blood play is the transfer of energy (in the form of blood) between a consenting donor and the living vampire. The blood revitalizes the body and plays an important part in sustaining the living vampires energy level and life force.
Do all vampires live in coffins?
The answer to that is hell no! I am claustrophobic and even getting an MRI terrifies me!
Is sex better because you are a vampire?
Yes! The energy levels I give off act as a pheromone and women have said I was by far the best sex they ever had and the only person to make them orgasm. PS.
Do vampires prefer to get it on with mortals or other vamps?
Due to my extreme energy levels, I am drawn to others with high energy levels so much so that I must talk to them or take it further depending on the situation. It matters not if you‚Äôre a living vampire. If you got it, I want it!
What are some common vampire myths that you‚Äôd like to dismiss?
I don‚Äôt turn into a bat. I can see myself in the mirror and I don‚Äôt have real fangs!
Do vampires have idols that they look up to?
Currently there are no ‚Äúvampire idols,‚ÄĚ however, I hope to change that! If your talking TV/Movies then mine would be Lestat from Interview with a Vampire and Eric Northman from True Blood.
Is it hard to go against the grain and be a modern day vampire in today‚Äôs society?
Being different in any culture has its positives and negatives. People enjoy alienating what they don‚Äôt understand and due to the popularity of vampires nowadays, people consider you a ‚Äútrend hopper.‚ÄĚ I am doing my best to be myself and am expressing myself through my music and my band, Vampires Everywhere!. I have a ton of haters that constantly badger me because I consider myself a living vampire, however, I take their negativity and express it in my music. Being a living vampire is a gift and it has changed my life for the better. If you don‚Äôt like my lifestyle, there‚Äôs the door!
High-energy sex, aging at a slower rate that mortals, and being called the best lover someone‚Äôs ever had on numerous occasions? A modern vampiristic lifestyle doesn‚Äôt sound so bad! Hopefully Michael helped to clear up some of your misconceptions about vampires living in the world today. If we‚Äôve learned one thing from the information above, it‚Äôs that vampires do exist, just not necessarily in the sense that traditional folklore depicts them. Next time you pass by a mob of people and think you see someone wearing fangs and looking very pale, don‚Äôt be so quick to dismiss the fact that it may in fact be a living vampire. If you‚Äôre in Hollywood when this happens, chances are you‚Äôve just had a run in with Michael Vampire!
The moon is a very powerful magnetize r of energy; on the full moon and when the moon is on the higher moon phase‚Äôs people and other animals emotions are often increased. How many times when crime is at a high, people are going crazy, or the police and/or the emergency services are called out more than usual do you hear people claim ‚Äúit must be a full moon‚ÄĚ? As Vampyres we should embrace this and harness the moons power and ability‚Äôs. I myself when the moon is especially beautiful and noticeable right out the moon and ask her to share her natural abilities. You may however want to be careful because if you do not particularly know how to ground overly negative energy or transfer it you yourself could be overwhelmed with negativity. I myself do pretty well with that and tend to try and only focus on positive things.
This I believe is one reason why the night time is the easiest time for us Vampyres to feed as energy is at a higher point and easiest to take as well as manipulate. I also believe as Other Kin and because of our abilities as Vampyres the moon is a natural source for us as well as a beacon (for Energy). I believe we are supposed to harness this as children of the Moon. It is often said that the sun is the beacon and light for Human/Animal as well as Plant kind in the physical world and I believe we as Vampyres/Other Kin are children of the night or another plan (astral). Therefore the moon is our beacon and strength.
To harness this one (a Vampyr) only has to focus and use this to the best ability. Red candles are best used as power candles for these types of rituals. One only has to will there results to harness them. Since the moon is our beacon and source this should be pretty easy to do. The moon is more than willing to help us as it is our aid in energy consumption just as the Humans, other Animals and Plants have the sun to aid them in energy.
It‚Äôs not just modern vampire myths‚ÄĒ ever since the dawn of time, people have tried various methods of using the blood of the young to try and rejuvenate the old, but the bad news for shamans and ancient high priests is that just sacrificing babies isn‚Äôt good enough. A recent study in mice has shown that injecting the blood of young mice into old mice puts an extra spring in their step.
Researchers at Stanford University just published a study in Nature that may give new hope to those looking to stop the effects of aging on the brain. The study found that when blood from a young mouse was injected into an older mouse, that older mouse enjoyed what could almost be termed a ‚Äúrejuvenation effect‚ÄĚ: it began producing more neurons, firing more activity across synapses, and even suffered less inflammation.
Interestingly, performing the reverse, in which a young mouse was injected with blood (or, more accurately, plasma, which is the parts of blood without blood cells), resulted in young mice with distinctly elderly attributes‚ÄĒincreased inflammation, a reduction in the production of new neurons, that kind of thing. The researchers used plasma because blood cells are actually too large to travel through the blood-brain barrier into the brain. But certain chemokines, small proteins secreted by cells, are indeed small enough to pass through, and the team actually isolated several that could be causing this effect.
Hello my name is Gavin i am 28 years old i live in Salt Lake City,Utah and i am seeking female sang and psi vampires that are in need of a donor im clean and helthey and i always get my blood checked please contact me email@example.com or 801-824-5194
So, I do this because I'm still fairly new to being a donor, and the only experiences I've had have been less than favorable. Bad side effects and lies. I just want to know what you all look for, need, or want in a donor, and what I can expect. Nobody else has been able to give me a straight answer. Thanks a bunch! :D
Herbal medicine is one of the oldest forms of healing. In fact, herbs are often called the "people's medicine" because they offer a convenient and affordable source of medicine, and in some parts of the world, may be the only medicines available to people. With the growing use of and interest in natural alternatives to pharmaceuticals, there is a consequent need for healthcare consumers to have more information about the healthcare practitioner who specializes solely in the medicinal use of herbs. Herbalists who work in clinical settings are a little known piece of our ever-evolving healthcare system. In this article, I will provide a background on herbalists philosophy and training, as well as how they function in a clinical setting. This article is designed to help the wider consumer better understand not only when to see an herbalist, but how to go about choosing one.
Distinguishing Characteristics about Herbalists
Most herbalists are grounded in a belief in the body's innate healing capacity and use herbs to aid in the creation an internal environment that stimulates the body's vital life force (often referred to as Qi or prana). Simply put, most herbalists (with the possible exception of those trained in a strictly western medical model) seek to understand and treat the underlying health issues, rather than to use herbs to eliminate specific symptoms.
Clinical herbalists are typically trained in a traditional system, such as traditional Ayurvedic medicine or traditional Chinese medicine. For both of these systems, herbs are a very important therapeutic tool, however, herbs are one of many tools these systems use. These healing traditions serve as the analytic framework or system that helps an herbalist determine the nature of the health concern and how to go about addressing it through the therapeutic use of food and herbs. Many herbalists gravitated to one of these (typically eastern) traditions, in large part due to the absence of a wholistic framework in the west for understanding wellness and dis-ease. There are wholistic, intact systems in the United States, mainly in regions such as Appalachia or among Native Americans. However, because these systems are not widely practiced or taught outside of these communities (although this is starting to change), many herbalists either learned that tradition from a family member, sought out individual teachers in these regional traditions, or became trained in a system such as Chinese medicine.
These traditional systems are all wholistic, nature-based systems that focus on restoring balance to the overall organism, rather than on the elimination of physical symptoms. Physical and emotional symptoms are seen as the signposts and clues that help to understand, as well as to differentiate the root cause of the imbalance, which, in turn, provides invaluable information on how to heal it. Because the body is seen as a microcosm of what is occurring in the macrocosm of nature, nature is seen as a key resource for understanding not only what causes health imbalances, but also points the observer to specific plants and mineral substances that can be used to restore harmony.
What Does a Clinical Herbalist Do?
Many people do not know what to expect when they go to see an herbalist or may not know when to consult one. Herbalists not only have an in-depth knowledge of plants, but also have concrete experience using them, as well as monitoring their success in a clinical setting (usually both with themselves and with clients). Herbalists can select for you the most appropriate combination of herbs and monitor and adjust that formulation as you continue to change and heal. Given the confusion that can arise from the wide array of herbal products on the market today, trained herbalists can help to understand which products to use and under which circumstances they will be the most effective. Much of information published about herbs in the popular press does not reference people with concrete clinical experience who know how herbs work in the messy, complex real world, making herbalists a valuable resource to navigate the ever-growing range of available products.
A key role of a clinical herbalist is their ability to apply the knowledge of whatever tradition they use to differentiate the cause of a particular health issue. For example, health issues such as a headache or insomnia do not typically have one origin in traditional systems, but multiple potential causes, that must be understood in the context of the individual. A practitioner, through the case history, can differentiate the cause, and thus create the most effective herbal formula, based on that differentiation. Successful treatment is contingent on understanding and addressing the true underlying cause. Treatment is extremely individualized based on a person's constellation of symptoms and physical constitution, and includes not only herbal formulations, but food and lifestyle recommendations, as well. This can explain why some people find relief when self-prescribing an over-the-counter herbal remedy for something such as menopausal health concerns, and some find no relief. These products speak to a generalized understanding of a health issue, but can not address the way that specific constellation of symptoms, nor the way they express themselves in a specific individual's constitution.
Because clinical herbalists are trained and have experience in the art of formulation, they know how to combine herbs to maximize their effectiveness. Many herbal products, and indeed, much of the research and practical literature about herbs in the US focuses on the use of single herbs for health issues, like St. John's Wort for depression, chamomile for an upset stomach, or valerian for insomnia. A clinical herbalist rarely uses single herbs, especially to treat complex health issues. Interestingly enough, data from around the world on the safety of herbs supports this practice by showing us that herbs used in combination are found to be safer than herbs used singularly. This is because herbs in a formula work synergistically. Herbs are combined in a way that counterbalances any potential side effects certain herbs may have when used individually. In fact, using a single herb for health issues (especially chronic and complex issues) is not often sufficient in and of itself as there usually are underlying factors contributing to it that often need complex mechanisms to address it fully, as well as successfully. Although, as any good herbalist knows, there are always exceptions to every rule.
Training and Regulation of Herbalists
There is currently no licensure for herbalists at the state or national level in the US, nor is there an accepted, standardized course of study for herbalists. In part, this is due to the vast differences in both the traditional systems herbalists use in their individual practices, as well as the vast differences in the way herbalists are currently trained. Certain traditions do offer licensure for their practitioners. For example Chinese medical practitioners can receive a Diplomat of Chinese Herbology from the National Commission for the Certification of Acupuncturists (Dipl CH) or OMD (Doctor of Oriental medicine).
What can be very confusing for people is that, in addition to these tradition specific recognitions, there is also a distinct community of herbalists (myself included) who receive their training outside the recognized schools within those specific traditions. This is because there are distinct training opportunities for those who do not identify by the tradition they use (i.e. traditional Chinese medicine), but by their use of herbs as medicine. It is important to keep in mind, however, that not all of the herbal medicine training programs teach practitioners a traditional analytic system such as Chinese medicine. This is a very key issue to consider when choosing an herbalist. That healing tradition, whether it be a Native American tradition or a West African one, is the practitioner's reference point that allows them to assess if what they are doing is working, and if not why, as well as how to modify the treatment strategy accordingly.
Herbalism is a unique profession in that you still have practitioners who gained their formal knowledge, not always through formal schooling and a degree program, but from apprenticeships or one-on-one study with individual teachers. I have met some truly gifted herbalists who have no formal training or degree and who learned primarily through self study and apprenticeships. Because there is no standardized course of study, a graduate degree in herbal studies or designation such as "master herbalist" does not guarantee that a practitioner is a competent clinician, has mastered the use of a diagnostic system such as traditional Chinese medicine, or has even met a baseline level of knowledge. This can make it difficult for consumers to assess an herbalist's qualifications and skill level.
In many ways in the herbal profession in the US, you are recognized by the person or people with whom you have studied. Many of these teachers were part of the "Herbal Renaissance", as it is sometimes referred, of the 60s and 70s and were instrumental in helping bring the knowledge of systems such as Chinese and Ayurvedic herbalism to the United States. Knowing with whom an herbalist studied can give you many pieces of information such as an herbalist's philosophy, their analytic system or framework, and even their approach to dosage. This, however, is usually meaningless for people outside the herbal community, as it is it's own special language.
Because of the variety of healing systems herbalists use, the most important considerations are that they are well-trained in the characteristics and uses of herbs, how to apply them through the use of their diagnostic system, as well as the application of the principles of that system in a real world setting. If in doubt, always ask an herbalist about their training and background. A good herbalist should be clear about their scope of practice and be willing to answer your questions. Quality Control of Herbalists Within the United States
There is a group, the American Herbalists Guild (AHG), founded in 1989, that is the sole organization in the United States that represents and advocates for practitioners who use herbs medicinally. The AHG deliberately includes practitioners from a diverse variety of traditions, such as Native American and traditional Chinese medicine. The AHG has a peer-reviewed professional membership application process. Eligible practitioners are those who have been trained either through formal schooling or through apprenticeships and who have had a clinical practice for a minimum of 2 years. If accepted as a professional member, the practitioner is then able to use the designation Registered Herbalist (RH AHG).
However (to confuse matters further), there are many talented, gifted herbalists who do have professional membership in the AHG. So, while AHG can help to distinguish an herbalist's level of skill, it does not mean that an herbalist who does not have this designation is not equally qualified. If you have questions or concerns, it is important to ask a practitioner to clarify their position about such issues as what diagnostic system they use, how they were trained, andwhether or not (and why) they are involved in the AHG.
About the Author
Michele Collins, RH (AHG), MPH, is a Clinical Herbalist who has a private practice in Winston Salem, North Carolina and works out of the Naturopathic Health Clinic. She is a practitioner of Chinese medicine and uses both Chinese and western herbs in her practice. For more information, you can reach her by phone at 336-624-6727, by email at firstname.lastname@example.org or visit www.michelecollinsherbalist.com.
In our quest to hold herbalism up to the scientific eye, trying to mold it into a clinical science, we have lost touch with the very essence of herbal healing. It is not the clinically tested, standardized medicinal constituents of the plants we need for vitality and balance, but their more obscure, subtle properties. They have an innate ability to offer us the soothing relaxation, gladdening, quieting, emotional defrosting and grounding our over stimulated minds and tired spirits are so much in need of right now.
The Gift of Plants:
Healing for the Body, Mind and Spirit by Suki Roth
We live in stressful times, far from the comfort and peace one experiences when immersed in an intimate relationship with nature. What is it exactly that is causing our modern ills?¬† The question here is a bit like the saying "what came first the chicken or the egg"?¬† Is it physiological disorders or disorders of our spirit and emotions?¬† Luckily we do not have to ponder this question.¬† In their molecular cell structures, medicinal plants hold all the keys necessary to unlock our physical, emotional and spiritual vitality.
Through many hours of plant meditation, individually and in groups, I have been introduced to the subtler benefits the plants offer. Let me share some of my most profound plant meditation and clinical experiences with you. This in itself is a difficult task as picking out a few plants to highlight is like picking your favorite child. You love them all and they all offer so much individually.
¬†Collect Meadowsweet while it is in flower. Use its beautiful leaves and sweet almond scented flowers for your tea or to tincture. Your first experience with either the tea or tincture will be one of deep release and relaxation. Meadowsweet has a warming, relaxing and soothing effect on the digestive tract. It contains large amounts of salicin, one of the main ingredients in aspirin, without the harmful effects to the stomach lining. It is specific for gastric pain, abdominal cramps, colic, and irritable bowel. Its pain relieving qualities are indicated for tension headache, muscular pain and arthritic complaints.
Meadowsweet, a great facilitator for achieving a deep meditative state, also has the ability to quiet the mind and guide the body into a restful sleep. Considered the emotional "chill-pill" it defuses congested thoughts while putting one at ease. It eliminates emotional pain that stems from living in a fast paced over stimulating world. Meadowsweet is able to rebalance electrical body charges making it an ally for opening up energy centers in the body. With daily use for a month or so it expands the body's energy field creating a greater sense of self and a boost to self-expression. A favorite herb of the Druids who believed it made the heart "merrier". A must for mild depression. Safe for children, elders and the overly sensitive.
Dose: Make a tea using 1-2 teaspoons of the dried herb to one cup boiled water steep for 15 minutes. Drink three times a day. Tincture 2 or 3 mls¬† (60-80) drops three times a day.
Betony (Wood Betony)¬†(Betonica officinalis)
¬†Collect the aerial parts¬† (leaf, stem and budding flowers) of Wood Betony just before the flowers bloom. Prepare yourself for a little taste of heaven with a cup of tea or tincture.
Wood Betony is one of my favorite herbs for insomnia. It quiets our restless minds and caps our frayed nerves. Its medicinal actions are anti-spasmodic, nervine, and anodyne (pain relieving). Wood Betony is specifically indicated for tension headaches caused by stress, fibromyalgia pain, and sore, over worked muscles.
A tonic for the nervous system, it reduces fatigue and tension the symptoms of nervous exhaustion, by inducing a restful sleep.
Wood Betony with its antispasmodic action relaxes our bowels, musculature and our stifled sense of self- expression. Creating the sensation of being nurtured and held it fosters a feeling of safety and protection. This opens up our emotional body and allows us to express our creativity and stimulates self-expression. Wood Betony has a stimulating opening effect on the solar plexus, considered the center of "gut-level" instincts, groundedness and self-confidence. A true anti-anxiety it erases contracted life experiences. Wood Betony considered a brain tonic, will increase arterial blood flow and cerebral circulation. Lose that frenzied burn out feeling with a cup of Wood Betony today.
Dose: 2 teaspoons of dried herb to one cup boiled water, steep 20 minutes drink three to four times a day. Tincture 20-60 drops three to four times a day.
You now have two new calming friends to take along on life's journey. Do not forget the old stand bys, Lavender, Chamomile and Lemon Balm. Cheers, to your health and well being.
¬†As an¬† herbalist for the last 16 years¬†Suki Roth¬†has had the opportunity to share her knowledge and great love for the large bouquet of medicinal and edible plants growing "right outside our doors". Sharing her intimate knowledge of the plants is her life passion. She is available for classes, workshops and consultations all designed to connect you to the gifts the plants offer us for healing on many levels. For more info on contacting Suki please see her web site¬†www.herbhaven.com
Lauren Zeifman's swish waiting room looks like that of many Park Avenue medical offices, but hers is filled with patients who are about to fork over as much as $2,500 for a vial of their own blood, one they hope contains the key to eternal youth and flawless skin. This new tribe of beauty addicts is as eager to receive a so-called vampire injection as Twihards are for their next Bella and Edward fix. Vampire injections or Dracula therapy & is the latest crazemi among Manhattan's well-heeled Botox-and-fillers set. In an appointment of no more than 30 minutes, the patient's blood is drawn and then spun in a centrifuge to separate out its plasma, the watery part that contains platelets & proteins and growth factor said to promote tissue regeneration and collagen renewal. That fluid, called platelet-rich plasma, or PRP, is then injected back into the patient's wrinkles. Recipients claim it softens lines and restores a fresh, dewy glow that can last a year or more.
In the world of cosmetic enhancement, PRP injections are considered the next big thing. Adherents say that, unlike toxins such as Botox or fillers like Restylane or Juveacutederm, their own blood is a natural way to get rid of fine lines, even if the concept is totally creepy. Zeifman, the founder of Park Avenue Skin Solutions, boasts long blond waves and skin so devoid of visible pores or creases she could be one of the undead. "Fillers may look good under the eyes for a short time, but the skin is so thin, they usually produce ridges [that] don't look natural," she explains. Vampire injections, by contrast, are "thinner than water, so it's the only thing at this point that improves the undereye area without any risk of bumps."
In 2002 scientists discovered the value of the treatment as a wound healer. Now posh New Yorkers are clamoring to have it injected in their faces. According to Jim Weeks, president of UBS Aesthetics, which sells Selphyl, a patented technology that streamlines the process, June sales were double those of previous months and the number of doctors giving injections has grown by 50 percent since the start of the year. While Zeifman says some of her patients have found the concept too bizarre and have opted to stick with synthetic fillers, most like the fact that the product is, well, organic. "When I thought about [using my own blood], I got a little queasy, but that wasn't enough of a deterrent not to do it," says David Munk, 46, a pale redheaded actor who lives in Jersey City. "[Now] I get roles playing guys in their thirties. Lauren is my secret weapon."
Marie Hallas-Imperato, 61, a former model from Queens, was nervous at first. "When I saw the needle coming, I thought, 'Get ready, this is going to be painful,'" she recalls. "But I must say, it wasn't. I looked tired all the time. People now think I am in my forties and I don't dare tell them the truth." Janine Corletta, 47, who works in the fashion industry, was dating a 32-year-old who invited her to a black-tie work event. "I'm surrounded by all these models at work. In the last few months they've been talking about these shots. Having to meet this guy's bosses pulled the trigger." Corletta made an appointment with boyish-looking Dr. David Colbert, the Flatiron-based dermatologist Angelina Jolie has turned to for various beauty therapies. "I feel like it lopped 10 years off, but I don't look overamplified or jacked up."
Soho resident Nicholas (he prefers not to use his last name), 40, got his PRP injections from Smoothmed's Dr. Jack Berdy to close his next deal. "I am in sales and have to appear alert, but I was getting circles under my eyes," he recalls. "I had injections in my forehead, eyes, cheeks and mouth. Now my friends call me Benjamin Button."
First posted: Friday, September 09, 2011 05:56 PM EDT | Updated: Friday, September 09, 2011 05:59 PM EDT
Vampirism played a bizarre role in the strange relationship between Tim Ferriman and his girlfriend who secretly recorded a plot by Ferriman, Kevin Madden and another youth to murder the Madden family at their Toronto home in November 2003. The girlfriend took their words seriously and her audiotape anchored a strong prosecution case in a trial that concluded in with Madden being convicted of first-degree murder in September 2006. Ferriman insisted he was merely joking with her in the faint hope of fanning their dying romance.
The twisted allure of vampirism had worked earlier for Ferriman. Ferriman and the girl ‚ÄĒ who cannot be identified since she was 14 at the time ‚ÄĒ met in October or November 2003 at a mutual friend‚Äôs home where he boasted to her that he was a vampire, robbing and killing people and sucking their blood. During that evening, he accidently broke a plate. The girl cut her hand while cleaning up. Afterwards, Ferriman asked if he could drink her blood. Within a week, Ferriman and the girl became an item. Within four or five days, her feelings for Ferriman changed. She testified she ‚Äúwas scared of Ferriman and that his interest in vampires ‚Äėweirded‚Äô her out.‚ÄĚ
By Friday Nov. 21, only four days before Johnathan‚Äôs murder, she tried to spike her relationship with Ferriman. She acquiesced into continuing with him but she aimed to slowly freeze him out. During the first of two trials, she denied she was fascinated by vampires. But those denials caught up with her while the jury deliberated in February 2005. A newspaper published her website which clearly contradicted her testimony and Justice David Watt declared a mistrial. She used ‚Äúbite for blood‚ÄĚ as her e-mail address and for a period of time, maintained a blog under the same monicker. In 2004, after the murder, she posted a profile on the website ‚ÄúVampire Freaks,‚ÄĚ displaying semi-nude photos of herself and listed her likes as ‚Äúblood, pain‚ÄĚ and ‚Äúcemeteries.‚ÄĚ She maintained that she had posted on the site to speak to others interested in vampirism so she could better understand Ferriman.
Police: Floridian, 22, chomped male victim, 69, on face, arm
SEPTEMBER 8--A Florida woman who claimed to be a ‚Äúvampire‚ÄĚ last night attacked an elderly man, biting him on the face and arm and tearing away chunks of his skin, according to police.
Josephine Smith, 22, was arrested today and charged with felony aggravated battery on an elderly person. Smith, seen in the mug shot at right, was booked into the Pinellas County Jail, where she is being held in lieu of $50,000 bail.
Ellis, 69, received stitches to close up wounds suffered during the assault, which occurred in front of a vacant Hooters in St. Petersburg. Cops says Ellis, who uses a motorized wheelchair, was asleep when Smith pounced on him, commenced biting, and announced that she was a vampire.
The bleeding Ellis escaped his attacker‚Äôs clutches and called 911 from a nearby gas station.
When cops arrived, they located Smith--covered in blood and half naked--near the Hooters, according to a police spokesman. During questioning, she was unable to tell officers what had transpired outside the shuttered restaurant. Nor could she explain what had happened to her pants or why her panties were at her ankles. According to her Facebook profile, Smith has recently studied ‚Äúdental assisting‚ÄĚ at the Fortis Institute in Pensacola, where she resides.
Ellis, who police described as a transient, has been arrested at least 12 times over the past four years for crimes like trespassing, panhandling, battery, and disorderly intoxication. He is pictured here in a mug shot taken following an a bust four months ago. (1 page)
I think I have done what I can but it is maybe time to take a break from "people" or at least until I find a little peace of mind. Luckily I have a good bunch of Admins I hope can keep things going and not let what I did do die in vein...
I am about done trying to make friends when all most people seem do is lie about you, take advantage of you, and leave you if you not fucking perfect (having flaws that are not my fault)! To hell with them no matter how much you need them...
That is one reason why I only have online friends...
My name is Angelique or you can call me Angel. *smiles*
I decided to join after reading some of the personal ethics and beliefs that the founder JP wrote about. I was happy to find that his open and respectful attitude is reflected throughout the site by both the members and staff alike.
I look forward to exploring the many views and ideas expressed on this forum.
I am always, willing to answer any questions and will most likely, have quite a few of my own.*smiles*
I will apologize in advance for any future technical errors. I have to use my phone to reply or post anything. It can be a bit of a challenge at times. :p
Want to learn more about Egyptian vampires? Read on to find out how the modern-day concept of vampires is actually inspired by an ancient Egyptian vampire like creature...
Most of us are aware of the concept of vampires as introduced to us through the silver screen. The typical vampire is characterized as a blood sucking night creature with sharp fangs. However this is not a new age concept in reality because vampires have their ancient origins in Egyptian mythology. The Egyptians were known to be polytheists and one of the gods, rather goddesses that they used to worship had a character quite similar to the modern-day vampire. Sekhmet was the name of the goddess that was known to drink blood. Historical records have shown that Sekhmet was considered to be a warrior goddess in Upper Egypt. The Egyptians would depict her as a lioness that had a reputation of being Egypt\‚Äôs most fearless hunter.
The Egyptians also believed that the desert had come into being because of her breath. She was considered to be a protector during times of war by the pharaohs and was also regarded as being the deliverer of guidance.
Egyptian Vampire Cult
With the passage of time a group of Egyptians actually developed a cult which consisted of devotees to the blood drinking Sekhmet. The cult started to gain prominence and during the 12th dynasty the pharaoh actually shifted the capital of Egypt to a location known to be the center for this cult. This was the city of Ijtawy. It is well known that in ancient Egypt the governing powers, Royal bloodlines and religion were all strongly linked together. The same goddess was also known to be a soldier deity. She can actually be seen wearing a solar disk in many of her depictions. Consequently she was associated with attributes like justice and had the responsibility to keep order. Almost all her visual depictions show her dressed in the color red which symbolizes her connection with blood. The eye of Horus, Bast and Hathor were also other prominent deities that were associated with the blood drinking goddess.
Various other powers were attributed to this goddess. These included the ability to bring disease as well as its cure. In fact mention of Sekhmet can also be found in historical records made by ancient physicians. Priests of the time also associated the goddess with doctors. After every battle that cult of devotees to this deity would celebrate an elaborate Festival to appease their goddess. Annual festivals were conducted at the beginning of each year where participants would intoxicate themselves along with which dancing and music were a common part of these festivals. It was believed that through these actions the Egyptians could appease the goddess because of which their opponents would face destruction.
It is based on the character of the Goddess Sekhmet that the modern-day concept of vampires has evolved. Of course the way vampires are depicted in movies has been altered to appeal to the modern masses but in its essence the phenomenon of a blood sucking night creature takes inspiration from this ancient Egyptian vampire like creature.
Since that time, there has been virtually no follow-up information regarding the progress of this Council.¬† I am sure that amongst our readership there are some that are just a little curious as to what has been happening, as the subject raised quite a number of debates throughout the OVC.
For those of you not familiar with this Council, the definition of the VJC is as follows:¬† This taken directly from the article posted at the RVN on May 11, 2011.¬† For those interested in taking a look at their website, the link is as follows:¬† http://vjcassembly.forumotions.net/
‚ÄúVampi(y)re Judicial Council is an ad hoc Mediation Council representing the views and interests of consenting member Groups in collaboration with each other and within the Greater Vampi(y)re Community; acting as the expression of the member Groups desire to safeguard and protect the Greater Vampi(y)re Community from dangers and radical elements perceived to be presented by individuals and Groups both within and without the Greater Vampi(y)re Community, which could result in harm to the integrity and public image of the Greater Vampi(y)re Community and its members‚ÄĚ
One of the founders and the main contributor of the VJC Charter is Octarine Valur of the House Valur Vampire Coven in South Africa.¬† The following questions were put forth to the Council in an attempt to seek the current status of the VJC.
Since you are one of the founders of the Council, can you tell the readers the status of the VJC to date?
Currently, the VJC is in a state of inactivity, as no member has approached the VJC on any issue.
One of the most important things that the council intended to do was to warn the community about dangerous people in the OVC.¬† How has this been accomplished and where are these incidents posted?
Incidents of interest would be posted on the VJC forum. Thus far no member Group has approached the VJC with any such incidents, and as per the Constitution of the VJC, the body will not take action of its own accord. It remains the prerogative of members and member Groups to prompt an action.
Why has the official website for the VJC been virtually void of any new information since May 19th of this year?
Since the formation of the VJC in May 2011, no member group has approached the VJC with any incidents which they sought action on. The VJC does not hold meetings nor discussions outside of incidents brought to its attention, so unless a complaint or issue is brought to the VJC, one should not expect an action from the VJC. Also, for that reason, the official website of the VJC will also reflect that inactivity.
Have any current OVC groups currently listed as ongoing members of the VJC resigned and, if so, why?
Only one of the original Groups which participated in the formation of the VJC resigned, and that was shortly before May 19. Since that time, our membership has expanded to include the following Groups internationally:¬†
¬†House Valur Vampyre Coven‚Äď Port Elizabeth, Eastern Cape, South Africa.
Order of the Raven ‚Äď Florida, USA.
Halo of Septem Civis ‚Äď Virginia, USA.
House Noctem Aeternus ‚Äď Virginia, USA.
Vampire Nation Concord (VNC) - USA.
House Nereo ‚Äď Centurion, Gauteng, South Africa.
House Darkskye ‚Äď Auburn, Alabama, USA.
None of these Groups or community bodies has indicated a desire to be removed from membership
Lastly, is it your opinion, in hindsight, that the VJC may have been an idea that was too controversial for this particular time in the OVC?
In my opinion, the concept of the VJC was ‚Äď and remains controversial ‚Äď but no, not ‚Äútoo‚ÄĚ controversial. I believe that the VJC remains a good idea which can benefit the VC in the long run ‚Äď and those Groups which continue to list their support of it bear me out on this.
I would like to thank Octarine Valur for taking the time to answer the questions regarding the status of the VJC.
As an interested observer, I had the opportunity to sit down and read the transcripts of the debates when they were publically posted.¬† One thing that keeps coming to this writers mind is, of the many members and Houses in the VC/OVC that came out in favour of this Council, it is interesting to note there are only 7 groups that are listed as current members.
This entry was posted on Wednesday, August 31st, 2011 at 8:02 PM
Ok, this is an internal conflict of mine--not pertaining to only vampires but to all people. I have been thinking a lot on the issue of God/Gods the soul and survival of the self at odds, to the point it is starting to feel like a curse. Interesting, we are reading Gilgamesh in English.
The story is about a man obsessed with immortality, where the Gods are more angry and volatile, who would wipe out humans simply for making too much noise...and in the end he fails because he is heartbroken when his friend/ semi lover Enkidu dies. This is kind of what's on my mind, not just immortality but death and what makes a person really human or divine. People say you should have struggles in life, but struggles can become a hindrance too if you are not sure what you are aiming for. I tried to make a deal with the vampire who has somehow infiltrated my life for so long, and he simply laughed it off...more like "don't mess with me, I know I'm evil." Certain parasitic vampires end up this way because when they cross over, perhaps they lack sympathy but they certainly have a lot of power and a way to weave in across humans, to corrupt links and establish their own immortality.
You see, I'm at a crossroads...I've realized that emotional feeding is counterproductive, and makes me needy or come across that way...and energy feeding can cause negativity if not done right...but essentially many people are vampiric, especially some of the more advanced people with schizophrenia. I met someone on a forum for alternative views on mental illness, and we realized that a huge part of our so called "illness" was a few things: the ability to stop time, read each other's minds, psychically tap into each other, and yet...he turned around after my vampiric self showed, and changed..or began to doubt that what he said was real himself. He also has a very vampiric side, but he doesn't realize it.
It's complex, because not saying that vampirism is a mental illness, but when society and people are constantly attacking you it starts to take a toll on your mentality and spirit...so some people "like us" with schizophrenia develop ESP abilities to combat it as well as already had some that we were born with. My problem is my vampirism is so intense, that if I were to go off of the chemicals which shut down my Extreme states then I would go into over-absborant, over projective mode. We have it easy and hard, I can absorb material easily if it's interesting, but I get bored and annoyed when I know stuff intuitively before said, not quite the same as understanding the material...just knowing...what it is.
So I feel like there is forcefield telling me that I am not allowed to be a vampire, just like in the story of Gilgamesh where he is told by the Gods--that no human even 2/3 God is allowed to become immortal. It's an issue of morality, for me, and mortality too. But I'm craving that release right now..almost feeling like it's wrong to suffer the emptiness like this. I dont feel comfortable submitting in a church to God-heads and structures, but the idea of other Gods makes me somewhat uncomfortable, but less so than Christian thought. I believe Christians probably engaged in deeply ascetic rituals, much like vampire magic before The Romans cleaned it up and made it pretty.
All I want right now is some kind of secret power--a force that I am rejecting of my own accord.¬† I have messed with these powers before, out of anger occasionally and terrible mind fucks etc. happened. I tried to protect myself from an attack and ended up making it worse, aka angering the Gods. what bothers me is that if there ARE Gods then why are so many of us led to believe there are not, wandering aimlessly amongst a field of nails...not sure where to head but somehow finding their ways...so in essence, is it wrong and how can I possibly convince myself to learn to draw energy from people? It feels weird, even awkward..and I stand out enough as it is. I can do it, but on meds I feel power shifted. I guess acceptance and self acceptance is the first step toward gaining more control over this.
I'm really feeling stifled, and I don't know if this is necessary for me...my uncle died recently and this was when I first started feeling connected to the Gods--because he told me I should never kill myself, and made me promise this. He is out there watching over his children and us. I don't know if I fooled myself or what? He said a few things" dont worry about me, death is not like you think--there is more, it's like waking up....I think... But I can't take antidepressants, bad things happen when I do. It happened to my mom too, something with these chemicals make us ill...we're too sensitive to the "other" perspectives which the mind can create. Recently I smoked pot too much pot, and the next day I started thinking I could hear what everyone thought to themselves, I was afraid if people knew they would be freaked out...but I couldnt help it much...echoes and stuff. Superpowers...
I can't help wanting me to survive, and feeling so frustrated with piece by piece seeming to vanish...I started wondering about the ethics of a predator survival mentality, and if it's wrong because then we dont have diversity and genuine people dont get a chance, like good people--people who deserve to live, and live on. I have trouble distinguishing one person's worth over another's, I see everyone as equally deserving and full of potential...but...I've been trying to understand how to be selfish...it just makes me sick, how many people step over each other and me, especially me--for some reason, I feel like people are just stepping over me...because I am not into the survivalist stuff anymore. I think of God as someone important, like a guide or a teacher--but always there, and yet--extremely understanding, forgiving, but apt to frustration...who is God? I wish I knew God. Maybe God and I could figure out an answer to these unresolved questions and my theories...
My friend thinks psychiatry is a witch hunt...you say you can see--they say you're crazy for seeing anything more than the power games people play, when they lower you to their level just to rise above and snatch your dreams away. So in a sense, would I be right to enact revenge on others--or the system....is negativity ok sometimes? What if I'm not even that negative of a person to do damage anyways, if I kept my idea of negative balanced with the positive--in magic for instance, if I did a spell to make them see the light...see their faults...I want to change things, to shift the power--this is why I'm crazy.
I have incredible powers of influence...but I'm having trouble judging the truth from the fake or made up...and sometimes I get into limbo...after I smoked pot reality became a little more real when I came down. When I smoke pot my heart rate slows and my mind does something weird--its not just blacking out every 2 seconds, but I mean I go in between reality, time stops and 10 minutes seems to last a bit longer, I will see things over and over again...the same moment on repeat...but it's not that interesting, and I'm not into drugs to achieve what you can through love, meditation, and hypnosis and astral projection.